the reject bin

Well, these are those pictures I was talking about. I was all set to get up on my soapbox at this juncture, and decry the et cetera, and et cetera of whatever... but today was an instructive day. After the Harrison passed on these, I loaned them to a good friend, who knew someone that was putting on a show, and was willing to take anything to fill up wall space. Today she gave them back, apologized, said her friend wasn't running the show anymore, said they didn't want to use the pieces.

I remember exactly four paintings from the book of world masterpieces I poured over when I was six years old. I don't remember a single one of the still lifes, or landscapes, and I only remember Picasso's La Guernica because of the nightmares it gave me. The three remaining pieces are all figure and allegory- Cranach's Venus with Cupid Stealing Honey, Botticelli's Primavera, Ingres' La Grande Odalisque. They were captivating- to me they were the very pinnacle of what this thing called 'art' must be about. It's stupid to even attempt to describe it, but each of these paintings shone with a beauty which would not have existed save for the use of the figure. A beauty that passes beyond lust, transcending base passions, eschewing animal sexuality, ushering the viewer into an almost spiritual mode of contemplation.

If any one of those pieces had been submitted to my friend's show, or to the Harrison, would they have been rejected? The answer is a resounding 'NO.' The failure is not on the part of these organizations, the failure is mine, and in the pictures I made. I'm not Cranach, Botticelli, Ingres. I didn't catch a glimmer of that overwhelming, disarming, enlightening beauty. Honestly, who knows if I'll ever be able to. Going to try- just need to work at it that much harder, put more time into it. Not finished trying. Wait and see.

But tonight I'm verytired, and going home. And then I'm going to see how much 211 my belly can hold. And then I'm going to sleep for such a very, very long time.

Goodnight everyone, you're all so absolutely amazing.